Monday, January 31, 2011
My one critique of the place would have to be the bumper sticker...the bison silhouette is accurate seeing as there are abundant bison. The other silhouette is a caribou...not an elk. There are no caribou there. But I'm an asshole so I'll continue forth with the story. Sorry Neal Smith. I'm not that big of a hater.
When we first got inside the learning center we were greeted by a nice, old man. He gave us the basic layout of the place and tried to pressure us into watching a 20 minute movie about the park. I wasn't very interested in sitting, I wanted to go interact with the learning center. We politely said,
"no, we're not interested."
And after a few more minutes of prodding and guilt tripping we were allowed to go "interact." Above is a lovely example of a dead bison. Below is a lovely example of how GIGANTIC a bison skull really is, that thing probably weighed close to 20 pounds but I'm prone to exaggeration and would encourage you to wikipedia that shit.
The learning center was great. Lots of information about the prairie ecosystem and there were a handful of artifacts to ooooooooooooo over, which I did. Some of them were broken (crying pieces) but that's just the way things go when you're looking for arrowheads. These were some pieces they found while making the wildlife preserve.
We made it through the learning center and I bought some touristy things at the gift shop.
Then came the grand finale. The scenic drive around the elk and buffalo (bison) enclosure! It started off slow...just a few elk and just a few bison scratching their butts on trees. But we kept driving. We see a couple more bison, then, BOOM...about a hundred of them lying in the snow. They are gigantic creatures. They appear docile but I'm sure wouldn't hesitate creaming me if I got out of the truck to photograph them.
So, overall, a tremendous success. Except the bumper sticker and the tourist trap I got us stuck in on the way out of town. If an owner of a store tells you they are a tourist trap leave immediately, they probably never see people and will talk to you about how their antique store doesn't actually sell antiques for almost an hour and ask you if you saw the movie at the Neal Smith Wildlife Refuge a few times...but once again, I'm prone to exaggeration and you should probably check that tourist trap out for yourself. If you're a masochist, that is.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
"Why are you excited about printing that? The shirt says Floppy right across the chest, that's not a very flattering word. And about that stupid dog...what's up with that stupid dog?"
Anyone familiar with Floppy? Floppy was a dorky puppet that told jokes to the dorky youth of Iowa. It was a phenomenom that lasted 30, beautiful, years. Check out this dorky website to further investigate the saga of Floppy (or just wikipedia that shit)..
Friday, January 14, 2011
To get a good view of the image (it looks a bit dinky) click on it...then a little magnifying glass will come up, click on it again. Then you'll get a decent view.
Its about 22 x 13 or something like that. painted with gouache. over a looong period of time.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Funny side note: right after i said the candy was Chinese I had to google it to make sure I was correct...here's what came up on the LA times
U.S., state issue warnings on Chinese candy White Rabbit
September 27, 2008From Times Staff and Wire Reports
BEIJING — The Food and Drug Administration and state health authorities warned consumers Friday not to eat any flavors of White Rabbit candy imported from China because they may be contaminated with the chemical melamine.
The California Department of Public Health specifically identified White Rabbit candies imported and distributed by Queensway Foods Co. of Burlingame, Calif. Queensway is voluntarily recalling the chewy sweets after state testing detected melamine in some pieces.
Melamine is the compound associated with contaminated infant formula in China and last year's large recall of pet food.
The warning on the candies came as the FDA recommended that consumers avoid Mr. Brown instant coffee and milk tea products being recalled by Taiwan's Car Food Industrial Co.
The FDA said it was not aware of any illnesses in the U.S. linked to either the candy or the coffee and tea products. California officials urged consumers in possession of White Rabbit candy to discard it immediately.
The White Rabbit candies distributed by Queensway come in various flavors, including vanilla, red bean, coffee, corn, lychee, coconut, chocolate, mango and strawberry cream. All varieties have a picture of a white rabbit with a black background on the top of the bag.
Consumers with questions about the recalled product can contact Queensway at (650) 697-6633.
Friday, January 7, 2011
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Monday, January 3, 2011
where black crows cease to sit,
The leaves are dead,
the branches break,
and bark falls off this tree
Inhospitable home on a dusty dirt road
how did these piggies get high?
A warning sign?
A big fuck you to this passersby?
Oh, big ol' pink hides,
Oh, big ol' pink heads!
If I were that tree I'd be thrice over dead.
As dead as those piggies hung high on dead lumber,
a long lullaby for an unending slumber.